Buddy
by Yumi-chan-likes-chainsaws
Summary: After some misadventures with the rest of the BBB trio, England is left with the custody of a boisterous puppy. USxUK


**_Yumi- So, I'm getting to work on uploading all of these from usxuk summer camp. I'll be uploading about two a day of these, so sorry for spam! There's only,like, twenty of them...shit. And I hope to get my multi chapters finished with by Christmas._**

**_Bob- LIES_**

**_Yumi- shhhhhh. He lies (notnotot) so enjoy! Also, this one shot is stupid. Sorry, ruined the plot._**

-x-

Naturally when England had been called to Prussia's- coughGermany'scough- house, he had expected alcohol.

What he hadn't expected was Germany angrily yelling at Italy, Prussia banished to the corner and five puppies in Italy's arms. No, he hadn't expected that at all. He had presumed Germany was still over with Italy; he seemed to spend a lot more of his time there now that the two were haphazardly dating and that was where he was last time him and Prussia went drinking.

Damn, that was how this had started wasn't it?

Not that he could remember much of the night except for waking up with a pounding headache and a severe lack of clothes which he thanked God weren't due to France or anything else along those lines. But Prussia later filled him in on the fact that somewhere along the line, him and Denmark had thought it would be cute to let the whining Labrador next door in to play with Germany's dogs.

Play with them was not what he did, at least not in a conventional sense.

Which is where the puppies Italy had came from, seemingly enough.

"Germany, Germany, I want this one!" Italy wailed, poking one of the left-side females in the head dramatically, the puppy cringing and whimpering as he did so.

"Italy," Germany sighed, rubbing his temples, "They're only small and they are getting quite distressed. Please give them back to their mother."

Italy pulled a pout and gently let the puppies down, their little eyes not even open as they toddled wearily over to their mother, an Alsatian or German Sheppard or something. England didn't blame them for being tired; he had only been listening to the ruckus for two minutes and they were already doing his head in; Prussia was also yelling obscenities from his time out corner, grinning at England as the other searched for aspirin in his briefcase.

"Is this what I was called here for?" he asked slowly. He was jetlagged and his tiredness wasn't helped by the knowledge that he'd have another flight in a couple of hours back to England again.

Germany nodded at him and beckoned Prussia out of the corner. "Yes. As cute as Italy seems to find them-" Italy punctuated this sentence by rolling one weakly protesting puppy on to its back and tickling it's stomach happily, cooing a bit, "- I have no room for them. I have a cat and three dogs and I have no need for five more and no room for them."

England stared at Germany. "Well, what do you want me to do about it?" he asked tiredly, "I don't know anyone that is looking for a dog."

Prussia cackled, dropping his hand hard down on England's shoulder, ignoring England's attempt to flinch away like Italy was ignoring the puppy's. "Well, you have that nice o'l back garden, don't you Artie?" he said with a chortle, "Nice and big it is. Plenty of room for at least one of these puppies, right?"

England stared at him incredulously for a moment before blanching once he realised that the other man was serious. "No way," he told him, shaking his head to and fro, "I can't take a puppy!"

"Why? You have plenty of room; you live in the middle of nowhere," Germany stated, pulling Italy away from the traumatized puppy he was mauling, "And you're more than capable of looking after it. This was partly your fault anyways."

England chuckled wryly before shaking his head again. "No way in hell am I taking a puppy!"

Italy blinked slightly, before twisting away from Germany and grabbing a different one of the puppies and thrusting it into England's face. "But look at their widdle faces!" he protested, ignoring the puppy's mewling for it's mother and England's cries about swallowing it, "It's so cute! You cant deny it a home!"

England stared at the fluffy animal in front of him, raising an eyebrow as it yawned and pawed at Italy's hands to be let down.

Goddamn guilt trip.

And that was how, a month and a half later, Prussia called England back to Germany once again and once again there was no alcohol involved.

England noticed that the puppies were twice the size they were a month and a half ago, Their eyes open although they still toddled around anxiously, about to fall at any moment.

Italy and Germany weren't there and, when England counted the puppies, he noticed that one, the one Italy was so fond of probably, was missing. He shrugged and waited for Prussia to come over with food for them- the dogs, not England, obviously.

"Italy already chose the one he wanted," Prussia stated, dropping the large food bowl down beside the over eager pups, "West bets he won't last a day with it. They're feisty little things, see?"

To punctuate his point, Prussia went to pet a sandy coloured one on the right and it growled, nipping him quickly before turning back to the task at hand; eating. The albino just grinned, shaking his finger and showing the numerous bite marks up along it.

"And that's just from that one," he said with a chortle, "The rest aren't as violent it seems."

England wondered lightly what it was going to be like when that puppy grew up and actually had sharp teeth. Yikes.

"Yeah, alright. So you want me to take one home now?" England asked lightly.

"Yep sure, just pick a puppy! Den's being made take one as well."

England attempted a smile before looking down at the puppies in front of him, wondering how anyone ever shoes the one they liked best when they all looked so similar. Half of the ones left had colours of their mother and the other two had similar sandy tones to the Labrador they had let in four months earlier.

The pups finished their food, backing away slightly from the bowl as Prussia took it up to bring to the kitchen. England watched as they looked around them, bumping into each other while whining lightly. Then one of the darker coloured ones looked up at England, head cocked to one side in curiosity and tail lightly wagging.

And then it opened its mouth and let out an ear splitting bark. The sound of it made England jump almost two feet into the air and one of the other pups in close proximity fell over with a whimper. England then watched incredulously as the pup trotted over to where he was kneeling, his tail wagging happily as he let out another bark and nudged at England's knee.

Prussia sprang from nowhere after hearing the barking and grabbed the puppy up, shoving it unceremoniously into England's grasp. "Looks like he likes you! And it's not like you've any neighbours to annoy with that bark, so he's all yours!"

And so, England found himself on Prussia's doorstep with a bundle of fur licking his cheek sloppily. This was going to be a long day, and it was only nine in the morning.

-x-

"So what's your name, anyways?"

England didn't expect a logical answer and didn't get one as the puppy just barked loudly again, wagging his tail dopily.

"Do you want a name?"

The puppy whined, cocking his head to one side and struggled to be put down from England's lap, to which he grudgingly obliged. Upon being let down, the puppy scampered around the floor, sniffing England's living room carpet and, when he became bored of sniffing everything he could find, chased his own tail until he fell over with a whine. England chuckled lightly.

"Looks like you're not going to help me with this naming business, are you?"

Another bark and the puppy was back up on its feet again.

England smiled. America would have a right laugh with this little dog. He hadn't seen the younger boy in almost a month, but last time he saw him he was like a child when England told him that he was getting a puppy.

"You gotta let me play with it!" America had grinned, waving his arms around like a lunatic, "And you have to give it a proper dog name, not some sissy name! You have to give it something heroic!"

England smiled lightly at the thought. America obviously had a lot of work to do and so did he, so he wasn't expecting another visit for a while. The puppy was not even as unwelcome as England had originally thought it would be.

Surely having something to take care of would keep him company while America wasn't visiting; there were only so many things to do with unicorns and goblins.

"Buddy. That's a dog's name, right?" England asked, to no one in particular but the pup still gave a bark in almost agreement before going back to chasing a piece of fluff.

"Then, I guess that's your name then."

-x-

"Patch, this is Buddy. Play nice."

England's cat looked surprised at this intruder, watching Buddy through narrowed eyes at everything he did, disapprovingly.

Obviously, some mutt waltzing into his home and taking over wasn't going to do, but a few nudges from Buddy and a few scratches across his nose from Patch and the two got along.

Not fine or anything. They just got along. Period.

England was surprised that that part was so easy. Sadly, nothing else is.

-x-

England should have realised that nothing in life came easy at this stage in his existence.

And, no, this did include such a seemingly easy task as trying to put a collar on a hyperactive, three month old puppy. It seemed so easy in his head.

But, it's not so easy when you're chasing it around the entire house and when you yell at it to sit still all it does is bark, wagging his tail at you, almost like it's some kind of game.

"Don't you want to go for a walk?" England tried, obviously getting no response, "I thought dogs liked to go for walks?"

What dogs appeared to like, or at least Buddy did, was rip apart couch cushions and eat encyclopaedias. England had a right mind to give him back to Prussia after that-they were rather expensive encyclopaedias- but the pup seemed oblivious to his destruction, so he let him off the hook.

Damn, this dog reminded him of someone else's escapades.

Although, America had never gone as far as to _devour a book collection _as a child, or as an adult, though he wouldn't put it past him to be capable. Both physically and mentally.

England sighed, kneeling down on the ground while rummaging through his pockets. He didn't want to have to do this but the dog left him no choice.

"Treat?"

The result was immediate and Buddy's ear pricked up as he haphazardly scampered his way over to England, placing his paws up on his shoulders and almost knocking him on to his back. England quickly fed him the treat and used his munching time to clip the collar and lead on to his neck.

"Now," he said lightly, feeling the corner of his mouth twitch lightly as Buddy realised with horror that he had been tricked and it was game over, "Was that so hard?"

He smiled fully when Buddy looked at him with what he swore was an accusatory glare and reached across to pet him across the head. "Come on, it isn't that bad."

Well, half an hour later, Buddy agreed with that statement and England wished he'd never even tried. And all the consolation he got for the pulled muscle in his upper right arm was a nudge at his thigh and, later, an unmovable, sleeping ball of fluff on his lap.

-x-

_'How's the mutt doing, Artie?'_

_'The dog is fine, Prussia. Why did you call to ask me this again? Oh wait, I don't believe you ever state a reason.'_

_'Do I have to? I mean, it's the awesome me, right? Anyways, Italy is actually doing okay!'_

_'You're letting me know I have what, competition. I hardly think this is some sort of _who's going to crack first _contest.'_

_'Yeah, but if it was, it would suck to lose to Italy, wouldn't it?'_

_'Prussia, I'm hanging up now.'_

_'No one hangs up on the aweso-_

Call disconnected.

-x-

"Why couldn't this wait for the meeting?"

Ireland smiled sheepishly, pushing a few loose papers down on England's desk. "Mainly because I wanted to get this whole bailout thing sorted right away, alright. And partly to see if our brother was lying to me about this little fella!"

Now, Buddy wasn't very little anymore. Ireland had him bundled up in her arms, but his front legs still hung over her shoulder and his head could almost reach around her whole neck. Though, compared to Ireland's monstrous wolfhound she had brought with her that was wrapped around her legs, Buddy was rather small.

Rover whined on the ground and Buddy then began to whine too, struggling in her arms until Ireland was forced to drop him down. He then immediately pounced on the mush larger dog, which ran like hell with Buddy hot on its tail.

"Ireland, why did you even bring him here?" England sighed, thumbing through her papers while Ireland looked around the office door corner, blanching when neither dog was anywhere to be seen.

"I thought it would be a good idea to let them play together," she said sullenly, "I didn't know yours was going to scare him!"

"Your dog is afraid of its own shadow. But then again, small children are also afraid of its shadow."

Ireland huffed, unable to come up with a suitable comeback and instead settling for thumping down in England's chair with noticeable distain. "Yeah yeah, talk politics."

Twenty minutes later, there were still no dogs to be found, but they were mostly forgotten about anyways.

"Where am I meant to get that kind of money in pounds anyways?"

"Well, I surely don't know, but if your currency fails, I don't want your worthless money, alright. You pay it back fully in sterling."

"Where on earth will _I _get sterling?"

"Well, you'll just have to hope that the euro doesn't fail then!"

"What if it does?"

"I just told you; you pay me back in _my _currency!"

"I don't-"

Ireland didn't get to finish that sentence as she got a mouth full of Irish wolfhound as Rover jumped straight into her lap as Buddy scattered in and resorted to barking at her feet, no more room left on her lap that was currently occupied by a cowering monstrosity. A few seconds later, England's cat came scampering in too, leaping around the two intruders and perching itself on England's head, claws out.

It took moments for Ireland to pick her bits and pieces up, which even England admitted was a feat with an armful of wolfhound, and bid her farewell, giving a scolding smile at Buddy, who now looked rather upset that his reluctant playmate was leaving.

But, she stopped at the door, coked her head to one side and looked back at England over her shoulder before smirking lightly.

"Can I pay my debt back in dollars? You know, since you and America are _so close _and everything?"

This just earned the reaction she wanted, which was several books thrown at the door she just shut and unrepeatable obscenities thrown her way.

Buddy just growled and took his place under the table.

-x-

_Hey! Whassup?_

_What do you think it is? It's the opposite of down, you imbecile. Use proper grammar._

_Dude, ur no fun. Whatcha doin?_

_Well, I was reading until you interrupted me._

_Borin as ever. Hows pup?_

_Big and a nuisance. Like someone else I know._

_Ow, harsh. Just txted 2 say hi anywys_

_Well, hello then._

_Miss u __L u?_

_Fine, I'll humour you. I miss you too then._

_IKR?_

_I'm going to bed now, so goodnight, America._

_Nite Iggy!_

-x-

Three months into Buddy living with England, he picked up a new habit whilst bored in the back garden. The birds, that constantly annoyed him as if he was a cat or something, would tweet down at him from the trees and he used to just bark at them.

But, recently, he had been putting the toys England bought for him to good use.

Apparently, to Buddy, the sound of a bird tweeting was exactly the same as the sound his ball made when he bit into it, although, the sounds were completely different to human ears.

Sadly though, the birds seemed to think it one of them as well.

Which is how England ended up confiscating all the balls with squeaks in them after Buddy trapped a bird in the conservatory, breaking three vases and being caught by England just before he frightened the poor thing to death. Somehow, the bird managed to fly out the back door again in its traumatized state whilst England held a irritated Buddy down on the ground, scolding him while Buddy turned the deaf ear.

And so began England only using the balls with squeaks when he went to play fetch, something England hadn't attempted with the dog before.

Now, playing fetch started out okay. England yelled the usual catchphrase and threw the ball, smiling as Buddy's ears pricked up as he dive bombed the toy and shook it a few times. But the rest of it was the hard part.

"Now, bring it back! Good boy," England called across the garden. Buddy gave him a look and instead sat down in the middle of the grass with the ball, squeaking it delightfully. England watched incredulously before his mood turned sour.

"I said bring it back!"

No response.

"Idiot dog, bring it here now!"

Nadda.

"Don't make me go over there!"

England swore that that bloody dog just _smirked _at him. That was it. England stormed up the garden, glaring at the dog while Buddy just looked up at him curiously. He had all intentions of taking the ball from him ad not playing with him again to teach him a lesson, but he saw that- _dogs can't smirk, damnit. It's my imagination_- look in his eyes again and just as he reached for the ball, Buddy patted it out from his reach.

England straightened up again, sending a glare down at the dog in front of him. "You don't want to try it," he warned. Buddy just cocked his head to one side.

England reached for the ball again, only this time, Buddy snatched in his mouth and ran a few feet with it, settling down to chew on it once again.

"Sit still," England hissed, storming over the couple of feet and bending down to grab it again, just to once again have it patted out of his grasp, just before he touched it. Stumbling, England fell over, face first into the grass.

Warily, Buddy patted the back of England's head, and got no response. Laying there for a while, the pup watched England stand up and mutter a 'be that way, then' and stalk back inside leaving Buddy with a ball he didn't really want that much anymore.

Two hours later, reading with his cat on his head, grouchily pulling its owner's hair, England spotted an apologetic dog peeping his head through the doorway for the living room.

"In," England called and the puppy immediately brightened, knowing he had been forgiven, and went to curl up at it's usual place at England's feet.

-x-

_There in 5_

Now, America didn't usually give much warning before he visited, but telling him five minutes before his arrival was a new kind of late. And the fact that, in temper at being undermined, Buddy had just torn the new encyclopaedia collection to shreds wasn't helping much.

"Bad, America's coming," England scolded, quickly sweeping everything into the bin while Buddy watched, tail wagging and delighted that he rid the world of another set of educational books.

Patch swished his tail from his perch on top of England's armchair. America coming meant America's cat coming, which equalled no peace for the other cat, who naturally associated 'America' with disorder.

England sighed, giving Buddy a quick pet on the head and watched the door.

As it turns out, there was no need for him to do that because, almost a whole minute before the door swung open, Buddy was on his feet, restlessly whining at the kitchen door to be let out into the hall.

And so, England opened the door before America had time to even ring the doorbell, stopping him with his arm midway to reach it, his face lightly flushed.

"Hiya stranger," he said, grinning, "I got a surprise?"

England was just about to ask what before Buddy broke out of the kitchen and, with a single bound, knocked England flying into America and attacked whatever was behind him.

That whatever being a sandy coloured, biting, German Sheppard Labrador mixed breed puppy.

"You have one too," England said in wonderment, breathless and slightly redfaced from the close proximity of the position they found themselves in; England practically sitting on America's chest.

Elsewhere, Buddy leapt on America's puppy, earning a growl and a paw to the head.

"Well, I couldn't let you have all the fun, now could I?" America replied, grinning widely.

"Humph, it's fun alright," England said, hinting sarcasm as he folded his arms stubbornly. America blew out his cheeks in a pout.

"Do I not get a hello kiss?"

England narrowed his eyes before grudgingly letting him have that one. But all he got when he leaned in was a paw in his face and the look on America's face as he tried not to laugh.

"Buddy!"

As America choked out a laugh, Buddy gave a dopey bark and so brings us to our story's end.

.

.

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End file.
